Entertainment jokes
Q: What do Olympians make bad DJs?
A: They keep breaking records!
I was in an audition for the lead role of movie "Aquaman." The Director told me to dive into a pool. Then outta nowhere Penaldo showed up and made a big dive into the pool. The director was impressed and selected Penaldo for the movie.
Shame on you Penaldo for destroying my dream!
Pokemon: What’s Wailmer’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
I asked my dad why a grown man would play Pokémon Go?
He said “Wynaut.”
What do you call a daredevil Weedle who does stunts on a motorcycle?
Weedle Knievel.
Memes
Which Pokémon do soccer players like the most?
GOALduck.
How can you tell a Pokémon likes baseball?
Every night he turns into a Golbat.
I heard Steven Spielberg is coming out with a new movie about fat people called E.C.
(Extra Cholesterol)
Chuck Norris threw a grenade once. It killed 300 people.
And then it exploded.
What’s the difference between an orphan and Pikachu?
Pikachu, I choose you!
The dark side of kid songs:
You got a friend in me... you got a friend in me!
What show do orphans relate to? I'm going with "The Hunger Games."
Join the Kahoot!
9270442
Your hairline is pushed back farther than G.T.A. 6.
There's a disabled kid in my class, right? Oops, should've brought my Hot Wheels tracks.
Imagine orphans watching Spiderman: No Way Home.
I took my sister and cousin to a sleepover with lil Diddy, who my dad's friend has connections with.
I think the experience went fine, but they were traumatized. We got what we wanted.
What do you get when you mix alcohol with literature?
Tequila Mockingbird.
What do a male pornstar and an emo have in common?
They are both hung.
*True story*
I saw this guy with a very bad hairline who was painting himself blue and it said "Smurf Paint," but I shouted, "Megamind!"