Emotion jokes
Me: Wanna hear a joke?
Person: Sure.
Me: Never mind, I was gonna say my life, but my life isn't a joke! Jokes have meaning.
Person: Dear God...
The Twin Towers remind me of an emote... bing, bang, boom.
Why did the skeleton want a friend? He was feeling bonely.
Comment on this if you are somewhat like me: depressed, single, gay, and act like you're not burning inside.
When you think you're depressed, but you know you're probably just using depression to be lazy and self-loathing, but then you realize that it, in itself, might actually be a symptom of depression.
Well gang, it looks like we've got another mystery on our hands!
That was so funny, I forgot to laugh.
Why did potassium draw a tear that would result in him crying?
Because all of his friends argon.
I have the best life coach ever, because he taught me to not care. He did it so well that he died last week, and I still don’t care.
What do you say to an upset German?
Quit being such a sauerkraut!
How do you call a sad coffee? A depresso!
What's an emo's favorite part about being dunked?
The hangover.
I was making love to this girl, and she started crying. I said, “Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?” She said, “No, I hate myself now.”
– Rodney Dangerfield
Part 2: He walks up to a stake and nails himself there. Then he finds the knife and says to someone to find a cake to celebrate his death, but everybody came. That was the sign that nobody loved him, and that's how you know if people love you.
What do you call a train with bubble gum?
A chew chew train.
Oh man, I'm depressed.
Is depression an emotion or a state of mind? I call it a lifestyle.
It's sad when the person that gave you memories becomes a memory.
You know one of the worst feelings ever to exist?
When your parents and friends all still see the happy little kid you used to be...
...but in reality, that kid has been long gone for years. (not my words)
What's the difference between a man and a table?
The table doesn't cry when I break its legs.
This joke is so funny, I'll bet you greened (grinned).
My pencil sharpener when I bleed:
And I don't really care how bad it hurts. Cause you broke me first.
When I mist, I miss.