Emotion jokes
How many emo kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just like hanging in the dark.
What do orgasms and impulses have in common?
I don’t care if they have either of them.
Q. What's the difference between pizza and an emo?
A. The pizza doesn't cut itself.
What's the difference between your new girlfriend and a tornado? At first, there is a lot of blowing, and then your house will be gone.
Every depressed person just has to say, "I WANT TO JUMP OFF THAT TALL BUILDING RIGHT THERE!" and then points to the building and runs up to it like an immature child, and then they get disappointed when they aren't allowed into the building.
Nana when Zane kisses her in her mind: [Insert Chiwawa Scream!]
What did the drunk emo say to the bartender?
Nothing, she was hung over.
Why is jelly laughing a lot?
Because his friend goes nuts!
Are you choked?
I don't want to die.
He: "I love you."
Me: "I love myself too."
What’s the difference between depression and your ex?
Depression fucks you harder.
Why did Daveon go to the doctor?
Because he was feeling "Daveon" in the dumps.
There was a fancy dress party; the theme was emotions.
One guy came dressed in green, and he was envy; another person came dressed in red, and she was anger; another guy came dressed in blue, and he was sadness. Two Indians came, one came with a hole in a pear and his d*** was in the pear, said he was deep in dis"pear." The other Indian came with his d*** in custard, and he said he was f***ing dicustard!
Lemme just say one thing:
Depression is not funny. Two of my best friends have it, and it's actually quite hard to watch them suffer with it. They cry all the time, they get upset all the time, they either have wanted to or still do want to kill themselves. It's really not funny to joke about depression.
Why does my dad hate me? Really, please tell me, I'm tired of the constant abuse and pain.
I started crying when Dad began to cut onions.
Onions was such a good dog.
How do you make a plumber cry?
Kill his whole family.
Hey everyone, I'm back because I'm sinking back towards depression because my sister is really being a bitch, and my parents always side with her, and the stress over online school is just getting overwhelming, and I'm seriously considering hanging myself to end it all because the pain is just... terrible, and I feel like I'm not worth life.
How do you make a plumber cry?
You kill his family.