Egg jokes
Why did the chief go to jail?
Because he beat the eggs and whipped the cream!
What did the egg say to the blender? Nothing. It's an egg joke.
Q: How do you get a squirrel to like you? A: Act like a nut! 😂
Q: Why don't eggs tell jokes? A: Because they'd crack each other up.
Son: Dad, can you put my shoes on? Dad: No, son, I don't think they would fit me.
I'm on a seafood diet. When I see food, I eat it.
I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.
What do you call a bad "egg" meme?
Deep fried!
What do you call a too round egg?
A prEGGnant egg.
Me and my mom order Chinese food.
My mom grabs the egg roll and starts licking it up and down and sucking on it in front of the Chinese delivery guy. I said, "Why are you doing that?" Then my mom says, "I love him a long time so we don't have to pay for the food."
Why was the chicken screaming?
He had an egg stuck in his butt.
What came first: the chicken or the egg?
Doesn't matter, in the future, they'll come together.
Chuck Norris can make an omelet from Kinder surprise.
Why did the egg fall off the motorbike?
He was shite.
What did one gay sperm say to the other? "You think we’ll find the egg and all this shit?"
Enyaw’s fanny smells of dirty, moist, fishy, rotten egg, dead Elizabeth, pig dick, cow cum filth.
Dirty bitch!
Women have eggs and milk in them...
And they say that they don't belong in the kitchen.
Eggs
You crack me up!
What did the egg who was sun bathing say to the other egg? Don't look at my crack!
What do you call a hippo that lays eggs? A eggoppotimos.
What do you call a bald Mexican?
A huevo.
What does having sex with a woman and cooking an egg in a skillet have in common?
Both end with a loud annoying sound and a gooey mess to clean the shit up.
You wanna hear an Indian egg joke? (yeah-)
Never mind. You won't understand.
Why was the egg runny?
Because he'd just had sex with Jimmy Saville.