Egg Jokes

The ketchup told a joke no one was laughing but the egg was cracking up

dont cracke this joke up!

What has to be broken before you can use it? Answer: An egg

I was watching the London Marathon one year, and I saw two runners in costumes. One of them was dressed a chicken and the other dressed as an egg. I thought: 'This'll be interesting.'.

I went to the shops yesterday, I bought roast chicken, eggs and duck. The cashier read $45.99 it was an eggcelent price.

what did the egg who was sun bathing say to the other egg? Don't look at my crack!

what does having sex with a woman and cooking an egg in a skillet have in common? A. both end with a loud annoying sound and a gooey mess to clean the shit up.

In a bowl of golden delight, I savored each bite so bright, The potato salad, oh so fine, Left me feeling oh so divine.

The diced potatoes, oh so neat, In a dressing so cool and sweet, With onions and eggs, a treat, My taste buds did dance and greet.

The mayonnaise, a creamy dream, With mustard's zesty scheme, Together they did blend so well, My senses did take a spell.

The herbs, a fragrant delight, Added flavor with their might, Parsley and dill, a perfect pair, In this salad beyond compare.

So here's to the potato salad, A culinary work of art, That left me full and satisfied, And in my heart, a special part.

Little Johnny comes down for breakfast because he lives on a farm and his mother asks if he has done his chores or not. Not yet says little Johnny so he goes to feed the chickens, cows, and pigs. He ends up kicking the chickens, cows, and pigs and goes inside and asks why he got a dry bowl of cereal. His mother responds with, I saw you kick the chickens so no eggs for a week. I also saw you kick the pigs, so no bacon for a week either. I also saw you kick the cows, so no milk for a week either. Little Johnny's father comes downstairs and kicks the cats. Little Johnny looks at his mother and says you want to tell him or should I?

Why did the bird lay an egg on Stephen Hawkings Because he's is Stephen HAWKings.

What is a egg 🥚

Why does the egg crack cos it's sad

How does a rapper like his eggs?

Hard-boiled, to match his BEATS

What's white, yellow and goes 40 mph?

A train driver's egg sandwich

What did the egg say to the tuna

I was cooking eggs the other day. It was very EGGxiting, all though, I was EGGxaggerating, but, if you think that wasn’t funny to you, then your hard boiled, that’s all for today YOLKS, so I said before several cats starting fighting, that sh*t was a CATastrophe, these kittens were all like “You’ve gotta be KITTEN me.” Mean while, in the ocean, they just waved, SEA what I did there? You SHORE you didn’t? Oh, alright, that’s okay bud- I guess these ocean puns are too DEEP for you. No? Okay- but, you know why the skeleton was lonely, eh? Oh, cause he had NO BODY. Why didn’t the skeleton ask the girl out? He didn’t have the guts. What did the skeleton do to his gf? He B*NED her. No? Alright. Those didn’t make you laugh? Maybe I should hit your funny bone.

Me and my mom order Chinese food. My mom grab the egg roll, and start licking it up and down, and sucking on it in from of the Chinese delivery. I said why are you doing that for. Then my mom I love him a long time so we don't have to pay for the food.