Why does rapeboat like going to the dog shelter? It's cheaper than a whore house.
"If you're good at something, never do it for free."
Rapboat's mom charges $5 a blowie.
How do you know if a rapper's broke?
When he starts dropping cents instead of bars.
We used to have Reagan, Jonny Cash, and Bob Hope. Now we have Biden, no cash, and no hope.
In Israel, they don't have Walmarts; they only have Targets.
Gas is expensive nowadays.
In the 1940s, they got it for free.
Your hairline is like the economy it's going down
Cheap oil, no immigration, and no school shootings.
Corona did what Trump promised.
I saw a homeless dude and gave him $1.
I saw a homeless woman and gave her $0.77.
Minimalism is a scam created by Big Small to sell more less.
Drake has too much meat. Donate to the people in need.
President Biden ordered an F16 missile attack to destroy the Chinese spy balloon.
Americans are thrilled. It's the first thing he's done to combat inflation.
What do alcoholics and gas prices have in common?
They both get really high.
Why don't Chinese children believe in Santa?
Because they're the ones making the toys.
Dying mall be like...
"Toys" were us.
Goodbye, kitty.
Dying Canes.
Thomas Bulgin loves McDonald's dollars, A man of simple tastes, he hollers, With every visit, his heart does flutter, For golden arches, a fast food lover.
Those crispy fries, so perfectly fried, And burgers stacked, oh so high, The smell of grease, it fills the air, Thomas Bulgin, he'll always be there.
A dollar menu, his saving grace, A feast for him, a smile on his face, He counts his coins, with eager eyes, To savor each bite, a little prize.
In this world of fast-paced lives, Thomas Bulgin, he surely thrives, For in those golden arches, he finds, A moment of joy, that forever binds.
He cares not for gourmet cuisine, Nor fancy plates, fit for a queen, For in his heart, a simple truth, McDonald's dollars, his fountain of youth.
So let him eat, and let him feast, Thomas Bulgin, the fast food beast, For in those golden arches, he's found, A taste of happiness, unbound.
A Scotsman at the hairdresser: "How much is a haircut?"
"Six pounds."
"And shaving?"
"Three pounds."
"Good, then shave my head."
Want to save 50% on your Chinese?
Just ask before you pay.
I charge 50 bucks a suck.
Why did Hitler commit suicide?
He got the gas bill.
