Eating

Eating Jokes

A fully grown bull Great White Shark is 15 feet long and can open its jaws open up to 1.2 meters long. It could eat a small child in seconds. Anyways, I lost my job at the aquarium...

I saw my sister masturbating with a carrot. I said "Come on I was gonna eat that later! Now it's just gonna taste like carrots!"

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So a guy named Nathaniel just came home, and when he enters his sister’s room, he sees her f***ing a piece of broccoli. And Nathaniel says, “Abbie, what’s wrong with you? I was going to eat that later, and now it smells like broccoli!”

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REALLY CRAPPY JOKE ALERT!!! oh quin how was eating that tight butt must be nasty i heard u met from rear ending him

Friend 1. whats your favorite drink or food Friend 2. pizza Friend 3. Donuts Friend 4. i don't eat food but i do drink bleach Friend 1. (calling the suicide hotline) Friend 2. (Calling the parents)

There once was a man from Peru.who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke up at night ,with a terrible fright,to find out his dream had come true.

I was watching my boyfriends dog while he took a shower. I started playing fetch with the him when the ball went over the balcony. He went to get it and fell 10 stories. When i looked down, he appeared to be dead. My boyfriend loved his dog and I didn't know what to do ,so feeling awful, I sat on the couch and waiting for him to come back. About three minutes later he got out of the shower. He ordered some food and went to the table to eat when I said ,”you know , your dogs been a little depressed lately...”

Every culture has weird food.

Australians eat vegemite. The British eat haggis. The French eat snails. The Chinese eat dogs. The Americans eat their young siblings' private parts.

Me (an adult) with my girl going to a nice restaurant I asked the waiter "People under 12 eat free right" the water confirmed that yes people under 12 eat free, then my girlfriend said, "but I'm 13.