My "overweight" friend and me were talking at lunch.
Overweight friend: Man, why you so ugly dude?
Me: *annoyed*Jason when you stepped on the scale this morning it asked for you're weight not you're phone number.
Why do your orphans don’t drink beer. Because last time they did he went to suck some dudes toes then he try to take him to his parents but I guess that never happened
Ugly face dude: hi kiddo
Kid: hi kid: leaves
Kid turns back and says: wait a minute who are u?
Dude people gotta stop letting 9 11 jokes fly around like bro ur gonna my my brain explode
She’s got 20 dudes in her DM’s telling her she is pretty. Stand out, call her ugly.
one day an orphan went to jail and a big dude went behind him and said I want you and the orphan said finally
Hispanic and Latino people be like no more immigrants like dude aren't you an immigrant?
Some boy says 100000 digits of pi and dis other dude cant even remember da 1st one
Hi dude
Friend Hey did you catch that game last night? I did, it was so good! After that I went to Kane’s, because Kanes is amazing! What did you do this weekend I did-
Me Dude are you the Terms and Conditions? Because I don’t give a fuck about what you say.
Why are gay dudes so rude?
Because they are fucking assholes
"This is the dude who assassinated JFK"
"If you got a question, just shoot"
What did the neutron say to the atom? Sndwichis dude!!!!
Ur hairline is back people say look at this dude
dude ur last name sounds like a sea food shop, Jordan C
Random guy: Do you know Dee? Other dude: Who’s Dee? Random guy: Dee Snuts!
Your Friend: Bro I'm having a movie sleep over tonight. I've invited 17 people wanna come? You: Yeah but why so many people? Your Friend: Because the DVD says only 18+ viewers. You: Dude!!!!
This dude right here don't look nothing like no damn tyrese gibson. He look like a hot fishy tail termite all dress in green makeup.
Twin:Hey twin how’s is it going? twin2: weird twin bye twin:not funny dude
