Downing jokes
You're so fat, every time you go in the elevator, it goes down.
There is this little boy, and he gets in the shower with his mom and looks up and says, "Mommy, what are those?"
She replies with, "These are my headlights."
He looks down and says, "Mommy, what's that?" She says, "That's my garage."
So he gets out of the shower and gets in with his dad and looks down and says, "What is that?" The dad says, "This is my snake."
Later that night, he wakes up in the middle of the night and screams, "Mommy, Mommy, turn off your headlights and close your garage. Daddy's snake is trying to get in!"
Every 911 joke isn't that good.
Well, at least not until they come crashing down.
Your mama's so fat, when she grew an inch, she pushed the Earth down.
How is the weather down there?
My dad said not to touch this thingy called a gun, but I looked down that pole and pressed that thing, and now I'm in heaven.
What has two wheels and goes really fast?
A vegetable down a hill.
A guy is walking down the street when he almost steps in something. He looks down and says, "Looks like shit."
He crouches down and smells it, "Smells like shit."
He sticks his finger in, tastes it, "Tastes like shit."
He then smiles and says, "Well, good thing I didn't step on it!"
Your mom is so fat Santa Claus came down and said, "Ho ho holy shit!"
A panda goes to see a hooker. He goes down on her, he mates with her, he ejaculates and then he attempts to walk away.
The working girl asks, "Aren't you going to pay me?"
She opens the dictionary to "Prostitute: One who sells sexual companionship for money."
The panda picks up the dictionary and turns to the definition "Panda: A marsupial who eats, roots, shoots, and leaves."
Yo, if you don't stop bugging Watersharky, we'll all go down!
Which of these is the smartest; also, list them too: Is it autism, Down syndrome, or ADHD?
My friend said not to look down on me. I said I can't because I'm shorter than her.
Goofy ahh grandpa fell down the stairs, and he said, "Damn!"
What did the Titanic say to the people as it went down?
"I now nominate you to the ice bucket challenge!"
A nun going down a water shoot? She never felt so wet in all her life!
When I give you the signal, I want you to roll down your window and call the oncoming cyclist a prick.
I went out with this girl the other night. She wore this real slinky number. She especially looked great going down the stairs.
A chemical store burned down, and the firefighter just stood there, but at the end, the store fire just went out by itself. But the store owner still got angry.
Store owner: Why didn't you take out the fire?
Firefighter: Yeah, but it went out by itself.
Store owner: But still, why?
Firefighter: Your chemical store sells H20.
Store owner: Oh, I get it now!
Jimmy asks an elevator operator what he thinks of his job.
The operator shrugs and says, "It has its ups and downs!"