a little boy decided to burn a house down. the father put his arm around his wife, tears in his eyes, saying, "thats arson"
A son walks up to his dad and says "Dad! I just had sex for the first time." The dad goes "Great! Wanna sit down and talk about it?" The son says "I cant sit right now, my butt is very sore."
Dating a striper is like eating a bag of chips in class.
Everyone looks at you in disgust. But deep down inside they want some too.
6:30 is the best time on a clock... hands down.
what did they do with michael jackson when he died
he got so many plastic surgeries that they melted him down into legos and let kids play with him for a change
What goes 100mph and bounces up and down? A baby tied to the back of a truck.
If a midget with down syndrome shows up late for work, is it okay to say she's a little tardy?
Yo mama so fat, when she sat on Walmart, the prices went down.
Pennywise: They all float down here! Titanic: *hold my beer*
Say what you want against pedophiles, but they slow down in school zones.
My boyfriend told me to stop acting like a flamingo. So I had to put my foot down.
No one has the right to look down on others unless you're perfect, and looking down on others is not perfect either
it’s just true
How do you know when Helen Keller is home? Answer; When you hear somebody falling down the stairs!
Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other. One says to the other, "Are you all right?" "No, I lost an electron!" "Are you sure?" "Yeah, I’m positive!"
i fell from the stairs the other day. it really "got me down".
Don’t let an extra chromosome get you down
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke marijuana, Jack got high pulled down his fly and ask if she wanna, Jill said yes and pulled up her dress and had a little fun, stupid Jill forgot the pill now they have a son
I threw a Asian down some stairs. It was Wong on so many levels.
Call me an escalator because I let people down.
My favourite s3x position is ‘WOW’ its where I flip your MOM upside down
