Downing jokes

Priest

286 views ·

A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street, and they come to a kid playing in a sandbox. The priest says, "Hey, you wanna go screw that kid?"

To which the rabbi replies, "Out of what?"

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  • Insult

    1 view ·

    If I wanted to commit suicide, I would climb up to your ego, and then jump down to your IQ.

    Baby

    9 views ·

    A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “That’s the ugliest baby that I’ve ever seen! Ugh!”

    The woman goes to the rear of the bus and angrily sits down. She says to a man next to her “The driver just insulted me!”

    The man says: “You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”

    Baby

    9 views ·

    A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That’s the ugliest baby that I’ve ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!" The man says: "You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey for you."

    School Shooter

    424 views ·

    When the school shooter is just about to leave your classroom, and you think you're in the clear, but the Down syndrome kid says, "Goodbye."

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  • Incest

    504 views ·

    Billy: "I'm so used to having you in bed with me, I don't know if I'm ready for this long-distance relationship."

    Sally: "Ohh, don't worry brother, I'll just be right down the hall..."

    Blonde

    89 views ·

    A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde.

    The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.

    'What does it look like?' she finally asked. The policewoman replied, 'It's square and it has you picture on it.'

    The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. 'Here it is,' she said.

    The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "OK, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop..."

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  • Slide

    48 views ·

    If I place a slide on the edge of a cliff or a really high building, would going down it be considered "suislide"?

    Asking for a friend.

    Bullying

    487 views ·

    My friend and I were walking down the street, and we saw this one disabled kid getting bullied by three other kids. Urgently, we sprinted over to help. He had no chance against the five of us.

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  • People

    24 views ·

    Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, for instance when you push them down the stairs.

    Boy

    92 views ·

    A black Jewish boy runs home from school one day and asks his father, “Daddy, am I more Jewish or more black?” The dad replies, “Why do you want to know, son?” “Because a kid at school is selling a bike for $50 and I want to know if I should talk him down to $40 or just steal it!”

    Cover

    36 views ·

    Michael Jackson was working on a cover of a popular Elton John song when he died...

    His version was to be called "Don't Let Your Son Go Down on Me"...

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  • Dog

    31 views ·

    I was reading a book about an immortal dog yesterday...

    It was impossible to put down.