Dont jokes
Why don't orphans go to the shops? Because when their mum leaves, she's never coming back.
When his dick is really, really small, but you pretend it is so big it hurts so you don’t make him feel bad 'cause he is a nice guy.
How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
Don't be stupid, feminists can't change anything.
Why don’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
I don't like marriage. It's just like soup, as soon as you're done spooning it, it all cools off.
I don't think I'm allergic to this.
A deaf couple wants to know when to have sex.
The wife says, "If you want to have sex, squeeze my tits once. If you don't want to have sex, squeeze my tits twice."
The husband says, "OK, if you want to have sex, pull my dick once. If you don't want to have sex, pull my dick 437 times."
What do you call an autistic person? Names.
I'm autistic myself, so don't go crying in my comment section.
The depressed kid walked into the counselor's office.
"I'm feeling like killing myself," he said.
"Oh no! Don't worry, sweetie, just hang in there!," the counselor responded.
I don't joke about vegans. That would be tasteless...
I have no beef with them.
What’s the best thing about dating an orphan?
You don’t need parental consent.
Roses are red,
I don't know what is brass.
I tell myself,
"Don't touch grass."
Why don't Indians like snow?
Because it's white all over their land.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't wanna say this, but I have the flu.
I don’t understand why Christians are so against body piercings. Didn’t Jesus have four?
Those rape alarms give you a headache, don't they?
School teacher: "Hey kid, why don't you just go home to your family?"
Orphan: "My family never came back for me."
School teacher: "Your daddy must've really needed that milk."
Me: "What's the difference between an apple and an emo?"
Friend: "I don't know."
Me: An apple actually falls from the tree.
I just saw people writing "Zoophile," "Ailurophile," and "Dendrophilia" in their bios. I thought this was cool, but when I wrote "Necrophile" and "Pedophile," I don't know why people started hating me as if I did something wrong. I was just trying to be cool like them, man.
Boobs are like batteries...
AA will get the job done...
C is bigger than AA...
D is bigger that C...
...and if they're square, you don't want to put your tongue on them!