DOE jokes
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
It depends on how hard you throw them.
Why does the orphan commit suicide to join the other side to see their parents?
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, because they beat the room for being dark, then arrest the room for being broke.
What do a 9V battery and a butthole have in common?
We know we’re not supposed to put our tongue on them, but we do it anyway.
What pronouns does Michael Jackson use? Hee/hee.
What does a sex offender and Santa have in common?
They will come down your "chimney" tonight.
What does the blind man say when he walks past the fish market?
"Hello, ladies!"
What does the Trump administration use instead of emails? Alternative fax.
What does an orphan wish they could do?
Wish happy Mother's Day and Father's Day.
How many Emos does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They all just sit in the dark and cry.
You're so ugly that when you were born, your mother asked, "How does my little treasure look?", and the doctor replied, "I think we should bury it immediately."
What does LMAO stand for?
Launching Moms At Orphans.
Why does an orphan's calendar only have 362 days? Because they don't celebrate Father's Day, Mother's Day, and Valentine's Day.
What does a male Asian P*rnstar like to say?
"I love eating cat."
How many altar boys does it take to screw in a light bulb? Depends on how dark the priests' basement is.
What does Fortnite and real life have in common?
They both lost their tower.
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman?
A kinder surprise.
What does an armed bank robbery and Michael Jackson have in common?
Someone gets hurt.
What does the bee say to the fly?
"Buzz off!"
What does a person eat before a race?
Answer: They fast.