DOE jokes
Why does your grandma like gardening so much?
Because she loves getting dirty down on her knees.
Why does Miss Piggy douche with honey?
Because Kermit likes his pork sweet and sour.
If I die, does my depression die with me?
How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.
Why does an emo wish they were a fish?
Because they're underwater.
this MIGHT be cosmos phone
What does a clock do when he's still hungry?
He goes back "four" seconds!
What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop!
What does Bugs Bunny say when he has a boner?
"What's up, cock?"
Q. How does an ISIS terrorist practice safe sex?
A. He marks the camels that kick.
The doe comes out of the woods, shakes herself, and says,
"I can't believe I did that for 2 bucks!"
So my dad tells these jokes and someone posted one on this website so...
How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb? 101, one to hold the light bulb and 100 to spin the house.
There’s also one about a bowling ball in a bath tub he hasn’t told me that though. I'll research that.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
It depends on how hard you throw them.
Why does the orphan commit suicide to join the other side to see their parents?
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, because they beat the room for being dark, then arrest the room for being broke.
If an orphan wants food, who does it? No one. Everybody just watches him starve because they couldn't find his parents.
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it leaves and never comes back...
What does a person eat before a race?
Answer: They fast.
Why does an orphan's calendar only have 362 days? Because they don't celebrate Father's Day, Mother's Day, and Valentine's Day.
What does a male Asian P*rnstar like to say?
"I love eating cat."
You're so ugly that when you were born, your mother asked, "How does my little treasure look?", and the doctor replied, "I think we should bury it immediately."