DOE jokes
What does Santa say for the toys to go to bed?
"Time to hit the sack!"
I come in from work to see my wife dead on the sofa. As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of a dick fuck does that!
Me: How does this thing work?
ForTnite kid: Oh, you don’t know how to use a pistol? Look, I’ll show you.
ForTnitekid: *shoots foot*
Me: That wasn’t a very good demonstration.
Does an orphanage have daddy issues?
Yes, because he didn't come back from getting the milk.
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it leaves and never comes back...
Memes
How many altar boys does it take to screw in a light bulb? Depends on how dark the priests' basement is.
Why does an orphan's calendar only have 362 days? Because they don't celebrate Father's Day, Mother's Day, and Valentine's Day.
What does a male Asian P*rnstar like to say?
"I love eating cat."
What does Fortnite and real life have in common?
They both lost their tower.
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman?
A kinder surprise.
What does an armed bank robbery and Michael Jackson have in common?
Someone gets hurt.
If an orphan wants food, who does it? No one. Everybody just watches him starve because they couldn't find his parents.
What does a person eat before a race?
Answer: They fast.
What does a Trump supporter use to load his/her AR-15?
A MAGAzine.
Why does the basketball never get a date?
Because they dribble.
I’d roast you, but your mirror does that for me every day.
Does anyone know what's going on with all the creeps that joined and restart your school laptop to get everything unblocked?
I made Google Earth for orphan kids.
Sadly, it does not show where home is.
Why does an orphan never learn how to drive? Because he has no dad to help him.
What does my dad and the Twin Towers have in common? They used to be with us, now it's just a sensitive topic.