DOE jokes
What does a blind kid and an orphan have in common?
They can’t see their parents.
Why does the orphan have water with its cereal?
Their dad never came back with the milk.
How does a train sneeze?
It goes, "A-choo choo!"
Why does the Please Touch Museum sound like "police touch museum?"
Because they gotta watch out for the pedos.
What does an emo kid say to his best friend?
"Let's hang out."
Does money grow on trees? No.
What is money made of? Paper.
What is paper made out of? Trees!
What site does a vegetable go to when he/she is stressed?
cornhub.com
How many Sallys does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, she was electrocuted.
What does the school shooter do after shooting all the kids?
Shoot kids in them ;)
I was drinking a martini and the waitress screamed, “Does anyone know CPR?!”
I yelled, “I know the entire alphabet!”, and we all laughed and laughed. Well, except one person, he didn't hear the joke.
Tell the person next to you to spell "me." When they do, say, "You forgot the D." They should respond with, "There is no D in ME." You say, "Not yet." If this does not go as planned, well, then you are fucked for life.
Why does a blind man still have eyes?
So he can see that he can't see.
What does an orphan and a wheelchair have in common?
They can both be replaced.
What does a blind man crying and an unplugged TV have in common?
Nothing can be seen when they get turned on.
What do an M&M and juice have in common?
Window.
Question: What does tennis have that orphans don't get?
Answer: Love.
What does the cent say when it says hello? It waves.
What does a storm cloud wear under his raincoat? Thunderwear.
Chrome turns you into chrome, but there is a chrome back bling, and it does nothing to you.
How many Senators fans does it take to change a light bulb?
All 3 of them.
Hockey for life!