DOE jokes
Why doesn't the U.S. Government play Clash of Clans?
Because they lost two towers already.
How much does a hipster weigh?
About an Instagram.
Why does Waldo wear stripes?
He doesn't want to be spotted.
How does Skeletor feel after He-Man beats him up?
Skelesore.
What does a man with 20 children do now?
Now he eats sausages even with cellophane.
What does an orphan call a family picture?
"A selfie."
If you are what you eat, does that mean all squirrels are nuts?
How does a train dance?
It bogies!
What does an orphan not have in common with criminals?
Criminals are wanted.
What does the M and D in "orphan" stand for?
"Mum" and "Dad."
What does "the whole pile of poops" mean?
"The whole pile of shits."
Why does the singer put a radio in her fridge?
Because she can listen to call music.
What does one emo kid say to the other?
"I like your cuts, G."
What do a brand new house, me, and new jewelry box have in common?
We're all empty on the inside.
What do Shrek and onions have in common?
*LAYERS*
What does this website with its comments and a cult have in common?
We have a case of Witzelsucht.
What does Aaron eat for breakfast? Food.
What do a 100-year-old pornstar and The White Stripes have in common? Icky Thump!
Why does Aaron eat burgers on a Wednesday? Because his spine is bent, and his favorite gun in Apex Legends is the G7 Scout, and he uses the speedy Spanish man.
How many terrorists does it take to tile a roof?
It depends on how thin you slice them.