DOE jokes
When does a pentagon not have 5 sides?
When it’s intersected by a plane.
Why does Helen Keller use her left hand to play with herself?
So she can moan with her right hand.
What are a doctor's and a WWE fighter's ideas on child abuse?
Doctor's: Don't do it, it does not help. Mood behavior.
WWE fighters: If it can crawl, it can brawl.
Who does an orphan play soccer with?
No one.
What were the astronauts' last words before the shuttle blew up?
"What does this button do...?"
What does BLM stand for?
Black Lust Matters.
What does a cannibal and a spider have in common?
Both have eight legs.
What does an apple and an orphan have in common?
One gets picked.
If a deaf kid swears in sign language, does his mom wash his hands with soap?
I don't know if this is a joke or a question, but:
If killing yourself sends you to hell, where does sitting in the waiting room get you?
How many times does 42 go into 9?
Get in the van to find out.
What does FNAF stand for? Five Nasty Ass Fools.
Why does the disabled person scrunch his toilet paper up? Because that’s the way he rolls.
How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
It only takes one, but it takes a long time, and the light bulb has to want to change.
How does Stephen Hawking compete in the hurdles?
He ducks when he gets to them.
Doctor: "Does your penis burn after intercourse?" Patient: "I don't know. I never tried lighting it."
What does a pregnant 14 year old and her fetus have in common? They're both thinking; "Oh sh*t, my mom's gonna kill me!"
What does Stephen Hawking have in common with David Beckham?
They both dribble.
What does a tornado need when it has multiple sclerosis?
A hurri-CANE.
Do you remember what Bruce Willis' last movies were?
Neither does he.