What does a nearsighted gynaecologist and a puppy have in common?
Wet noses.
DOE Jokes
When does a cub become a Boy Scout?
When he eats his first brownie.
How does Daveon like his coffee? Decaf-eon.
What does Yoda say when he’s at the strip club?
"Dirty bitch, you are."
Why can’t you take an Asian guy golfing? Because you can’t drive. Every time he does, he tries to put a hole-in-one.
What does Can do after eating its vegetables?
Go on eBay to see how much he can sell the wheelchair for.
How does the cop respond to being called racist?
He said, "How can I be racist? My wife's eyes [are] black."
How many CIA agents does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
They don't need lightbulbs--they glow in the dark.
What does the SpongeBob intro and a pedophile have in common?
"Are you ready kids?"
Q. How does an ISIS terrorist practice safe sex?
A. He marks the camels that kick.
Son asks dad, "How much does marriage cost?"
Dad: "I don’t know, son. I’m still paying for it."
They say you should love your neighbor. Does that mean I have to love the president?
What does a pregnant slave and a "pay less" sale have in common?
Buy one, get one free.
What song does Kobe Bryant hate?
"Rocky Mountain High."
What do nail polish and panties have in common?
Both come off with alcohol.
If a pregnant lady murders someone, does the child get an assist?
What does a depressed kid who loves geometry use to kill themself?
A hypoteNUSE!
What does a paleontologist and woke people have in common?
They both enjoy digging up the past.
How many emo kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just like hanging in the dark.
What does the word circumcise mean?
Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.
