DOE jokes
Why does an orphan only have a Samsung? Because it doesn't have a home button!
Why does the orphan not buy milk?
That's what their parents are doing.
Why does an orphan always try to escape the orphanage?
Because he wants to get money to buy a family since they won't buy him.
I thought happiness started with an “H.” Why does my happiness start with “U”?
How many gears does a French tank have?
One forward and six reverse.
Memes
Friend: If you could get rid of any one person in your life, who would it be?
Me: Me.
Friend: *does nothing*
(x_x)
I forgot that I don't have friends.
Why do my kids die?
Stinky Oussy :D
"Ligma" is a disease, so does that mean "ligma balls?"
Why does Mario eat mushrooms?
Because he's a very fungi!
What part in the body does an adult not need but actually needs to live?
A KIDNey!
Why does an orphan have to go to church? Because that's the only way he can pray for a father.
What does NASA stand for?
Need a star A.S.A.P.!
What do a 14-year-old and the fetus inside her have in common?
They both say, "Ohh sh*t, my mom is going to kill me!"
What does the right eye say to the left eye?
Between you and me, something smells!
What kind of shirts does Sally's parents get her?
Long sleeves.
How does a blonde punish her blind son? She takes away his TV privileges.
How does a blonde punish her deaf son? She takes away his telephone privileges.
How does a blonde punish her paraplegic son? She gives him a spanking.
Why does this exist?
Why do all of Oliver Anthony's songs sound like "shit"?
Answer: Because he sucks!
What does an autistic kid and a loaf of bread have in common?
They both have special needs.
What does a Jew expecting guests say?
"Oy, vey, are they here yet?"