DOE jokes
How does a rapper start a race?
With a ready, set, FLOW!
Why [does] a tranny say "Have a good day" to a Jew?
He [is a] goy.
What do nail polish and panties have in common?
Both come off with alcohol.
If a pregnant lady murders someone, does the child get an assist?
What does the word circumcise mean?
Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.
How much does a hipster weigh?
About an Instagram.
She does not wanna fuck you, and she don’t need you clapping them cheeks.
What goes up and down and does not move?
Stairs.
What does a car have when it's very itchy?
A road rash.
Q: A guy walks into a bar, what does he say?
A: Ow!
Why does Waldo wear stripes?
He doesn't want to be spotted.
How does Skeletor feel after He-Man beats him up?
Skelesore.
What does Santa say to 3 girls in a row?
HO HO HO
Does your cat scratch you?
Yeah, I need [to] give him payback, but now he won't respond.
Student: Why does everyone hate me?
Another student: Because U got the A last night.
Chris Hemsworth is Australian, and Thor is from space. Does that make him an Australien?
Does a midget count as an orphan?
My husband and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
Why is the older brother's kid brother that has autism always performing fellatio on his older brother?
Because he wants to find out how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop.
Why does Adolf hate golf?
He ended up in the bunker.