DOE jokes
The first orphan joke be like: What does the orphan not have?
A family.
What does a student always get on an alphabet test?
A!
Q: What gun does Africa not have?
A: A water gun.
How many feminazis does it take to change a light bulb?
None, because they can't change anything.
What does a broken down vegetable say?
I need new wheels.
How many children does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw.
Does your cat scratch you?
Yeah, I need [to] give him payback, but now he won't respond.
What does Michael Joseph Jackson say to adults when he sees them?
Keep away from me-hee-hee.
Q. What does Michael Jackson get his sex partners as a gift?
A. Crayons.
Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle?
His wife is dead.
How does Skeletor feel after He-Man beats him up?
Skelesore.
Teacher: What does a chicken give you?
Student: An egg!
Teacher: What does a fat cow give you?
Student: Homework!
Joke 1# "Knock, knock." Who's there? "Pastur." Pastur who? "Past ur bedtime."
Joke 2# Why does a slug always win a race? Because its components always stop for a break.
Joke 3# Your momma's so fat when she stepped on the scale it said, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number."
Two muffins are sitting in a bar.
The first muffin says to the bartender, "I'll have the usual."
The second one does not say anything to the bartender because muffins lack the vocal ability of humans, and even with the proper anatomy capable of speech access, they would most certainly be entirely unable to comprehend the human language. In fact, the first muffin would indefinitely not be able to provide speech to the bartender. The muffins also lack the muscular structure to be capable of support themselves to being suspended also preventing their access to movement. Even with the human-like structure, muffins lack brains, which are an essential part of being able to send nerve contact within the legs to be able to move. Also, with them lacking a brain structure entirely prevents them from speech. The anatomy simply prohibits the food items mentioned to be able to carry out any of the tasks required to get them to said bar and be able to speak, thus making the situation untruthful and completely idiotic.
What does an apple and suicidal person have in common?
They're both hanging from a tree.
Q: What's the difference between a suicide vest and a feminist?
A: At least one does something when it is triggered.
Why does Wednesday Addams never blink?
Why does the mushroom 🍄 have many friends?
Because it’s a fungi.
Q. How does an ISIS terrorist practice safe sex?
A. He marks the camels that kick.
Where does Kristen Stewart get her virginity from? She gets it from her mama and papa.