DOE jokes
After getting in the White House, D. Trump gets a letter...
...from the Iranian president. He opens it and to his surprise there is a paper with a weird looking code on it:
370HSSV 0773H
All confused, Trump contacts the FBI and forwards the letter to them in hope they can figure out the meaning, but they weren't able to. Trump gets angry and sends the letter to both the CIA and NSA, and they also fail to figure out the meaning of the letter.
One of the agents suggests Trump ask for MI6's help, so he does and few minutes after a British agent sends a fax to his secretary:
"Tell your president he was holding the letter upside down."
What does a rock and a girl have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
What does the orphan have in common with Batman? They both lost their parents.
If Tim goes to heaven and Tom goes to hell, where does Tam go?
Up your ass.
What does the Titanic sell most?
Icebreakers.
What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop!
What does NASA stand for?
Need Another Seven Astronauts!
Teacher: What is a cow?
Kid: Meat.
Teacher: Nice. What is a chicken?
Kid: Eggs.
Teacher: What does the big fat pig give you?
Kid: Homework.
What do frogs wear for shoes? Open toad.
What does your mom say to you? "Love you, moody."
Q. How does a girl from Alabama know when her mom is on the rag?
A. She can taste it on her brother's cock.
What type of sound does your crack make?
Answer: Quack!
Why does Helen Keller masturbate with her left hand?
She moans with her right.
What does grass and Rachel Sutherland’s wrists have in common: nothing, they both get cut.
Why does a woodpecker have a beak?
So as to not smash his head against the tree.
I'm pretty sure that "MOI MOI" means "ME! ME!" does it?
What does an orphan call home?
Nothing. 🤣
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? One, you just need to throw it hard enough.
What does a baby computer call its father? Data.
Why does a cow love music?
Because it can play a moo-sical instrument.
How does NASA organise a party?
They ‘PLANET’.