DOE jokes
Where does Kristen Stewart get her virginity from? She gets it from her mama and papa.
Why does an orphan play GTA?
To get wanted.
How many kids does it take to change a light bulb? Apparently not 343,646 because my basement is still as dark as yours.
Why does Ama like boomerangs? Because they actually come back!
What motorway lane does Stephen Hawking use?
Hard shoulder.
What does an orphan call a family picture?
Answer: a selfie.
If you get an apple a day, what does it give you?
Worms and rotten fruit.
Man A: "Is Google male or female?"
Man B: "Female, because it does not let you finish the sentence before making a suggestion."
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?"
Students: "Meat."
Teacher: "Very good. Now what does the pig give you?"
Students: "Bacon."
Teacher: "And finally, what does the fat cow give you?"
One of the students: "Homework!"
How many gears does a French tank have?
One forward and six reverse.
What do you call 2 octopuses that look the same? Identical!
Where does an octopus put its money? In an octo-purse!
How does NASA fart?
They fart with their ass-teroids.
What is yellow and does not float well?
A school bus.
Where does a snowman keep his money?
In a snowbank.
What kind of milk does a new age calf drink?
Dairy free.
What do a 14-year-old and the fetus inside her have in common?
They both say, "Ohh sh*t, my mom is going to kill me!"
What does NASA stand for?
Need a star A.S.A.P.!
How does Stephen Hawking have sex?
Enter, backspace. Enter, backspace.
How [does] a disabled kid face [the] Jalalas?
He can't run, just hug the bomb.
Why does Megan sound like a man, but she is a good singer and rapper, but then people talk about her? What's y'all rapper are singer?