DOE jokes
Why does Ama like boomerangs? Because they actually come back!
What motorway lane does Stephen Hawking use?
Hard shoulder.
What does an orphan call a family picture?
Answer: a selfie.
If you get an apple a day, what does it give you?
Worms and rotten fruit.
Man A: "Is Google male or female?"
Man B: "Female, because it does not let you finish the sentence before making a suggestion."
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?"
Students: "Meat."
Teacher: "Very good. Now what does the pig give you?"
Students: "Bacon."
Teacher: "And finally, what does the fat cow give you?"
One of the students: "Homework!"
How many gears does a French tank have?
One forward and six reverse.
What do you call 2 octopuses that look the same? Identical!
Where does an octopus put its money? In an octo-purse!
How does NASA fart?
They fart with their ass-teroids.
What is yellow and does not float well?
A school bus.
Where does a snowman keep his money?
In a snowbank.
What kind of milk does a new age calf drink?
Dairy free.
What do a 14-year-old and the fetus inside her have in common?
They both say, "Ohh sh*t, my mom is going to kill me!"
What does NASA stand for?
Need a star A.S.A.P.!
How does Stephen Hawking have sex?
Enter, backspace. Enter, backspace.
How [does] a disabled kid face [the] Jalalas?
He can't run, just hug the bomb.
Why does Megan sound like a man, but she is a good singer and rapper, but then people talk about her? What's y'all rapper are singer?
I gave an orphan an iPhone XR because it does not have a home button.
I went to a sleepover at my best friend's house. He lives with his grandpa and little brother, his mom and dad. His little brother likes to run around the house naked sometimes. I can't help but notice his grandpa always looks up when he does.
What commitment does a pimp make to each new hoe he turns out?
Answer: He will always be there for her after the break-in period.