How did the tree get sick?
It got tinsel-itis.
If certain diseases spread in water, why does Africa have them?
I was watching TV with my brother, and a diabetes commercial came on saying, "I have type one diabetes, and I manage it well."
My brother said, "You want a cookie?"
Have you ever heard about the new virus in China? It's called Hupun.
Hupun DEEZ NUTS!
I have it.
What do we want?!
A cure for Tourette's!!
When do we want it?!
Cunt!!!
Yo momma is so fat, when she caught the flesh-eating bacteria, it gave up!