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Difference

Difference jokes

- Got myself a bathroom scale so now I know exactly how much I poop.

- Right. So you weigh yourself before and after you poop and calculate the difference? That’s cool.

- Oh...that might actually be even easier.

What’s the difference between a priest and target?

Nothing, they both have children’s pants half off.

What's the difference between a golfer and a skydiver?

A golfer goes *whack* "darn" and a skydiver goes "darn" *whack.*

What's the difference between emos and 9/11?

The emos are still there, high up off the ground.

What's the difference between a child and a carrot? About 140 calories.

What's the difference between a peanut and a priest?

With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.

What do / and \ have in common?

They have different results.

What’s the difference between a prostitute and a Twinkie?

Nothing. They both squirt their white stuff when you eat it.

What’s the difference between an LGBTQ and brain cells?

Brain cells make up their mind.

What's the difference between pizza deliveries and the Twin Towers?

Pizza deliveries get their orders right.

What is the difference between a frog and a trombone player?

The frog might be on his way to a gig!

Little Johnny was in class, and his teacher asked, "How many of you guys are Trump fans?" Since the entire class wanted to be liked by the teacher, they all raised their hands, well, except Little Johnny. So the teacher asks, "Why are you being different again, Johnny?" So Little Johnny says, "Well, because I'm a Democrat. My mom is a Democrat, and my dad is a Democrat, so I'm a Democrat!" So then the teacher responds with, "Well, what if your mom was a moron, and your dad was an idiot, what would that make you?" Well, Little Johnny says, "A Trump fan!"