Difference jokes
What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.
What's the difference between apples and orphans?
Apples get picked.
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and Rocket League? You can't stand up.
What's the difference between an emo kid and a pack of Oreos? The bar code on the emo kid gets longer every day.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What’s the difference between an emo and grass? The grass doesn’t cut itself :D
What's the difference between a cat and a human? About 500 bullets.
What's the difference between an orphan and a slice of pizza?
Nothing, I eat both of them.
What is the difference between a rock and my girlfriend?
One is rock hard, and the other is Dwayne Johnson.
What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
120 pounds.
What's the difference between you and a fridge? The fridge doesn't moan when I put my meat in.
What's the difference between a girl and a toy? There is no difference because you play with both anyway.
As an American, I like cars. And like all car enthusiasts, even just a little scratch can ruin a brand new car.
So why is it that we go to different countries like India and see that almost every car is completely totaled? I guess we have different meanings of "it's just a scratch."
What is the difference between a dead baby and an orphan?
The dead baby happened on purpose while the orphan came out as an accident!
What is the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby? One sticks to the roof of your mouth, while the other one doesn't!
What’s the difference between you and Jesus? We know who Jesus’s dad was.
What's the difference between a dick and a rock?
One's hard.
What’s the difference between an orphan and a sugar donut?
People want donuts.
What's the difference between an American police man and a Christian?
At least a Christian kneels in church.
What is the difference between you and me? I have parents and yours left...