Difference jokes
What's the difference between sand and a dildo? Sand has never gone up my ass.
What's the difference between your mom and your dad? One leaves your life to go get milk, and the other cleans up after you, feeds you, and does your laundry.
What's the difference between a blonde and your computer?
You don't want your computer to go down on you.
What’s the difference between a 5.7l v8 and a dead baby?
If you lift the hood on my car, you won’t find a 5.7l v8.
What's the difference between cancer and a baby?..
There is none.
What's the difference between a yandere and a gun?
Nothing.
Flip them off the wrong way and you're dead.
What’s the difference between cereal and a baby?
I personally think cereal is not nutritious.
What's the difference between Batman and Robin?
Batman can go to the store without robbin'.
What's the difference between a T-Rex and your sister? I can't stick my dick in a dinosaur.
What’s the difference between grandma getting ran over by a reindeer, and a poor kid’s parents getting ran over by military tractors?
When grandma got ran over by a reindeer, the kids actually gave a sh*t.
What’s the difference between a bird and a human?
“We don’t eat with our peckers.”
Roses are red, your penis is blue, the bed sheet has turned a different color, too.
Q: What is the difference between a drunk and a stoner at a stop sign?
A: The drunk guy runs it and the stoner waits for it to turn green!
Q: What is the difference between a drunk and a stoner at a stop sign?
A: The drunk guy runs it, and the stoner waits for it to turn green!
What's the difference between a pope/preacher and acne?
Acne comes on your face when you're 13.
What's the difference between my dad and a hooker?
Hookers come back.
What’s the difference between a baby and a beet?
Beets stain your teeth.
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde girl?
One stops sucking when you smack it.
What's the difference between that bridge and my will to live? None, they're both too short.
What's the difference between a gun and my will to live? None, they are both absent.