Dick jokes
Man 1: You look like Scott Cawthon.
Man 2: I'm gonna put your dick in a Coffin!
Man 3: Me first!
"Dick, you're fired."
"I'd buy that for a dollar."
A man walks into a bar with an alligator and a stick. He walks up to the bartender and offers to put on a show for the bar's patrons in exchange for a drink. The bartender agrees, so he pulls down his pants, sticks his dick in the alligator's mouth, and starts whacking it with the stick. After he's done and gets his drink, he asks if anyone else would like a go.
A lady gets up and says yes, she would like a go, asks that he doesn't hit her with the stick.
My friend Richard is always bullying all the little kids in the neighborhood. He is such a dick.
Why are Indians dark?
Because they are born and bred in chicken curry.
Why did Obama marry Michelle?
Because he's into chicks with dicks.
Son: Hey, Dad, why is my name Dick?
Dad: Oh, because a dick fell on you when you were born.
Son: Ohhhhh, so that's why I'm gay.
Everybody loves "appreciation." So that's what I named my dick.
A friend of mine chews gum, lays back to yawn, then chokes on the gum. Then I said, "God, what, you choking on dick?"
How is a woman like a condom?
Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.
Highest level of insult by a girl by seeing a guy's dick:
"I can shit bigger logs than that thing of your's" 🤣
He probably picks hair off his dad’s dick, then probably puts it in his hair.
What's the difference between a dick and a cannon?
Your dick shots longer.
"Dick dick dick, fuck dick nugget shit."
Roses are red, shit is brown, Get that dick out my ass so we can go to town.
What happens when you combine candy and dick? That creepy guy down the street!
Say:
"Eye"
Spell:
"Map"
Say:
"Ness"
Now say it fast!
Once, there was a brother and a sister that shared a YouTube channel. He named it "Penis Dick Marathon."
Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? Why couldn't the pervert cross the road? Because his dick was in the chicken's ass!
My girlfriend said, "GIMME EIGHT INCHES AND MAKE IT HURT!"
So I pumped my dick in her 4 times and hit her in the head with a brick.