Phallus jokes

Dick.

You wanna hear a joke about my penis?

Don’t worry, it’s too long.

In Antarctica, there are ice dicks for ladies to hop onto.

Little do they know I've been waiting for this moment.

A penis has a sad life.

His hair is a mess.

His family is nuts.

His neighbor is an asshole.

His best friend is a pussy.

And his owner beats him.

What do five dicks sticking out of glory holes and five udders both have in common? They are ready for milking.

Life is like a penis: simple, soft, relaxed, and hanging free, until a woman comes around and makes it hard.

I was blessed with a 9 inch penis.

The priest is in jail now.

For boys, life is a lot like a penis: simple, soft, straight, relaxed, and hanging freely......... then a woman makes it really hard.😩😉😏