When a white person says the n word,
black people: "Y'all mother fu...rs ain't gonna believe dis shit."
Di Jokes
My dad died, so I dug his grave. I was asked why I murdered him. I answered, "Guess we'll never know who did it because he dug his own grave." My father was William Afton.
What happens when Steven Hawking dies?
Take his iPad to Cash Converters.
My auntโs star sign is Cancer, so itโs pretty ironic how she died. She was eaten alive by a giant freaking crab!
When I finished high school, I wanted to take my graduation money and buy myself a motorcycle, but my mom said no.
See, she had a brother who died in a horrible motorcycle accident when he was eighteen, and I could just have his motorcycle.
A man ate a glue stick. It tasted bad. He died. Hahahahah!
Guys, these jokes are not funny. My dad died, he was the best Arabic pilot ever.
What's the difference between the Queen's death and Princess Diana's death? The Queen died in peace, not pieces.
Penis gay be like: among sussy, ding ding ding ding ding ding di di ding.
Imposter is SuS!?
It hasn't been the same since Kobe died. I can't say "Kobe" anymore when going to shoot a shot. Now I have to say, "Kobe crash!"
Whatโs the difference between the baby I just stabbed and Isaac Newton?
Isaac Newton died a virgin.
If a baby dies in the womb, is it considered suicide?
Luigi was dying and had two sons. Bruno was handsome, but Alberto was ugly.
He said, "Maria, tell me, is Alberto my son?"
"Yes, Luigi," his wife said, and he died happily.
Wife said, "Thank God he didnโt ask about the other one!"
So this guy named Andrew Furda was my boyfriend for like a half a week, so five days. Then bam, I cut my hair. He only liked me for my looks, and I hoped he regrets it because it is WAR, so if you see this, you're going down, Andrew!
Stephen only died because his wife tripped over the power cord.
Q: Why is Japan the healthiest country?
A: Last time they had a fat man, 80,000 people died.
Teacher makes 1 kid recite the ABCs and the other count to 10.
Teacher: You can kill 2 birds with 1 stone.
Little Johnny goes home and throws a rock at two birds. One dies. He gives his dad a concussion from the rock hitting his head.
Johnny at school: You can kill a bird and give a man a concussion.
Did Jesus die a virgin?
Of course not, you idiot. He got nailed before he died!
Yo mama is so old, I told her to act her age, and she died.
My uncle died on 9/11. At least he died doing what he loved, flying planes.
