Depression jokes

Suicide is just freedom, life is just full of pain... Sometimes if you're gone maybe somebody might notice. Feels like life is a maze and the only way to leave is the exit. Nobody notices your pain, your suffering, and that you try your best though everyone notices your mistakes. Life just feels like everyone hates you. Life for me is just faking smiles, I'm not sure how everyone lives such a good life.

Lemme just say one thing:

Depression is not funny. Two of my best friends have it, and it's actually quite hard to watch them suffer with it. They cry all the time, they get upset all the time, they either have wanted to or still do want to kill themselves. It's really not funny to joke about depression.

A new drug has been developed for lesbians with depression.

It’s called Trycoxagain.

How does the next train stop for a depressive person? Death.

Somebody told me to cheer up so.... I told him to pass me a rope :)

What do you say to a depressed person on the ceiling?

Hang in there!

I told my therapist I feel suicidal. He charged me in advance.

Why was JFK stupid? He only had half a brain.

Why do we even live? We're just gonna die anyway, so what's the point?

Did you know that there is a new drug on the market for lesbians who are suffering from depression? It's called Trycoxagain.

Only if onions were emo, they'd cut themselves.

I was in a motivational seminar about depression the other day, and she said I could be anything I wanted to be if I put my mind to it. Sometimes you just have to bite the bullet and do it, even if it's messy.

I can go to Walmart and scan my wrists. It'll say "antidepressants." ✨

What's the difference between me and my pencil sharpeners? Nothing, we're both broken.

What does an apple and suicidal person have in common?

They're both hanging from a tree.

Q. What's the biggest cause of infant drownings? A. Postpartum depression.

My son came up to me and said, "Dad, I'm depressed."

I pointed to the spare room and said, "Hang in there, son."

You look sexy with that rope around your neck.

My (at the time) boyfriend told our chemistry teacher that blood is corrosive to steel.

Anyways, my sharpener isn’t working because the blade has been too badly damaged from something else...

Someone: PLEASE EAT! I DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE!

Me: *Trying to remember how long it would take me to die of starvation because I've already googled it and given up because it takes too long.*

Me: Na, yeah, I still have 19 days left.