Depression jokes
I can go to Walmart and scan my wrists. It'll say "antidepressants." ✨
My ceiling fan isn't the only thing that's going to be hanging tonight.
You look sexy with that rope around your neck.
Why did the math book kill itself?
It had too many problems.
What's the difference between depression and a girl?
XXXTentacion can't seem to beat depression.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Your mom.
Fuck you you rwind my life.
I wish my grass were emo, so it would cut itself.
I wake up in the morning and I suck my teeth.
"I’m sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing.
Except at a funeral.
How do you lift a depressed person up?
No need, they'll find a way to get on the tree somehow.
If you are depressed, eat Panera Bread. It is so yummy yum yyum yum yum yum.
Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Prospero Ano y Felicidad.
Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Prospero Ano y Felicidad.
I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas From the bottom of my heart.
If I was an object in this world, I’d be a glass! Because if you leave me when I’m too close to the edge, I will likely shatter and break.
Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke, and it asked me, "What is the difference between a large pizza and you?" One can feed a family.
I got a toaster for my birthday and said, "Yay, new bath bomb!"
Guys, depression cannot be turned into a joke.
A donut and depression are the same. Both have nothing in the middle, and the other is nothing is left if you leave it for too long.
When my mom asks, "If your friend pays you to jump off a bridge, would you do it?" I say, "No, Mom... I'd do it for free!"
One time there was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track. A girl said, "Excuse me, can you move, please? I'm trying-" Then the man stopped her sentence and said, "How is your t-shirt so clean?" Then she said back, "Easy, hung it up."
I don’t struggle with depression, at this point I’ve got it down. I’m good at depression.
The belt broke.