Depression jokes

What is an emo kid's favorite Tool? A rope.

Imagine you're playing GTA and you finally found out how to take out a gun: Option 1: shoot someone Option 2: suicide

Me: Aren't they the same thing?

Which one fell first?

The depressed kid or the feather? Look at 1st comment to see answer.

Friend #1: "What's your favourite thing about trees?"

Friend #2: "Apples"

Me: "I can hang myself in them."

I tried to name my grass "emo" so it will cut itself.

People say that they can read people's faces; then how come nobody sees me breaking inside?

I'm sick of crying; tired of trying; yes, I'm still smiling; inside I'm dying.

Did you hear about the exciting new drug they developed for lesbians with depression? They call it: TRICOXAGIN.

What do you call the whole population turning into emos?

The Great Depression.

I tried to high-five a tree. It left me hanging.

What's life if you don't have one...

I cummed on the alley.

What's the difference between a depressed person and a pizza? Pizza won't cut itself.

If you ever become depressed, try drinking a gallon of water before going to sleep... That’ll give you a reason to get up in the morning.

What’s the similarity between a broken pencil and my life? They’re both pointless.

If you ever become depressed, try drinking a gallon of water before going to sleep... That'll give you a reason to get up in the morning.

How long does it take for a depressed person to change a light bulb?

5 days. & I’m pretty proud of myself.

What's the difference between a depressed person and a pizza?

Pizza won't cut itself.

Why make a joke when I wake up and look at myself?

Why am I still alive?

Pills give me stomachaches, blood makes me faint, height frightens me...