Depression jokes

What do you call depressed Sesame Street?

Emo's World.

Irritable Bowel Syndrome saved me from depression...

It’s hard to feel empty when you’re so full of shiii fuck ur mom.

I respect cancer more than I respect depression.

At least cancer has the balls to kill you himself.

Maybe if the grass on my front lawn had depression, It would cut itself.

When I died, my friend said he'd cover me.

I know what I want to be for Halloween! A pumpkin! I'm very good at carving into myself, after all.

Yo, I feel like shit when you're around.

What will make a depressed teenager happy?

A cliff.

Yeah man! Life is wonderful! But, when you realize all of the ones you loved were fake.

And when you die, does your online friends notice? How will they notice? Or will they ever notice? Is 13 age too young for dying? Am I just paranoid? I'm scared.

Twinkle, twinkle little star. I hope I'll get hit by a car. I am not dead yet, I hope I'll die. I hope I'll be born to a new whole life.

Noose: "Hey man, wanna hang out?"

Corpse: "Sorry man, I'm dead inside."

I went to self-checkout at a store and I scanned my products, but the scanner wouldn't scan the barcode on my arm.

If you don't like my suicidal jokes, sorry man, didn't know it cut that deep.

What do you call an elite bungee jumper? An emo kid.

An apple and an emo kid fell from a tree, which one hit the ground?

The apple, because the rope caught the emo kid.

Why do emos cut their arms? Because they can't cut the rope.

Why do emos hang themselves? Because no one wants to hang around them.

I think about my life, and then I think about death. I prefer death. If you ask me, life is just a time when you die. Basically, death is life, meaningless 0-0.

My life is so meaningless that I committed a crime just to get shot. 0-0

This is not a joke; this is just about death...

Life is karma... because I was born, God gifted me with social awkwardness, sh*t athletic skills, and stupidity.