So a kid was hanging out with his mom and this man comes up to him and said, "Hi, I'm your new dad." The kid did not think about it, and then he did and said, "But I already have a dad." The mom said, "That was not your real dad."
"Among Us" is basically a game about betrayal.
It must be tiring to put makeup on two faces.
"Hey, Firesharky... How did you know if I was your brother when I'm not? You didn't even say my name, and plus, I'm lying about my name."
I just wanted to say, Prince, that that "qwen" you were chatting with is totally fake! I haven't talked to you all day, I swear!
My uncle is a horrible ventriloquist. He put his hand up my butt, but he told me NOT to say anything.
Three drunk guys entered a taxi.
The taxi driver knew that they were drunk, so he started the engine and turned it off again. Then said, "We have reached your destination." The first guy gave him money, and the second guy said, "Thank you." The third guy slapped the driver. The driver was shocked, thinking the third drunk knew what he did. But then he asked, "What was that for?" The third guy replied, "Control your speed next time, you nearly killed us!"
A man was forced off the Eiffel Tower, but he flew back up.
The executioners asked, "How'd you do that?"
He said, "I had magic chips. Here, take some."
They eat them, jump off, and die.
He asks for more chips, and the guy says, "You're a real a**hole when you're drunk, Superman!"
I gave a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hairdryer.
HAHAHAH! You all got April fooled in the wrong month!
I'm dying... sike, I lied. You thought I died!
Dude, I lied.
Stop saying "cheetah cheater" jokes. They suck!
A husband walks into the bedroom door holding two aspirin and a glass of water.
His wife asked what that was for.
"It is for your headache."
"I don't have a headache."
He smiles. "Gotcha!!!!"
What’s green and has wheels?
Grass, I lied about the wheels.
Prince, don't listen to that Princess. She is a fake, I swear. I am the real Gwen.
My dad never came back with the milk. My mom told me he's in the army.
What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter?
"Quack, quack."
Well, I don't have a joke but... I have a poem.
My dick is red, your pussy is blue. I... lied to you.
Once a monkey lived in a jamun tree. His friend, a crocodile, came there to eat jamun everyday. The second day, he ate some jamun and left some for his wife. Soon, his wife said, "Why don't you kill this monkey?"
The crocodile was sad and then asked the monkey to come to his place. The monkey said, "What if I drown?" The crocodile said, "Jump on my back." The monkey jumped on his back. The crocodile soon said, "I am gonna kill you. My wife is sick and wants to eat your heart." The monkey said, "I left my heart on the jamun tree." Then the crocodile swam back to the jamun tree and the monkey jumped on the tree.
