My girlfriend went to Tokyo and she died in the tsunami. Since I was sad, my friend told me, "Don't worry, there's plenty more in the ocean".
I wish death was in the form of a woman.
That way, it would never come for me
what do you get when you die in undertale and go to temmie vilage? detemmienation
Paul Walker died Fast and Furious
What’s the only positive thing about Freddie Mercury’s death? The HIV test results.
*God creates dog* God: "You are man's best friend"
Dog: "That's pretty sexist"
God: "No, man as in- You know what, FUCK IT! You can't speak"
Dog: "....."
God: "And chocolate kills you!"
Dog: "🐶"
who is not hungry in africa. a dead person
Why is the Reaper not funny at all? Well, he tells dead jokes!
if i die does my depression die with me?
I wonder if any of these people are still alive.
Anyways,
When I arived at the pearly gates when I died, the guardian asked me how I died. I told him I was just hanging around.
There was once a grandfather. He had very little hair, and he lived in a forest. On his death bed, he was fully bald. So he told his children, "You see my head? I have no hair. All of my hair has been wiped, and I hope this forest doesnt experience the same. Children, every time a tree is cut in this forest, plant a new one in its place." So for years, and to this day, that forest still stands, each tree being replanted. All because of an old man and his Re-seeding Heirline.
Three men die the same time and I'll go to heaven to go find St Peter St Peter says to them is going to be a long journey to heaven so I will give you a good vehicle depending on how much you've cheated on your wives we'll start with you Michael since you were quite the womanizer you and cheating on your on your wife multiple times you will be getting a Toyota the man embarrassed left in the Toyota Nolan you you were better you cheated on your wife twice so I will give you a Mercedes now for now as for you mark you never cheated on your wife you are an absolute saint so I will be giving you a Lamborghini and the Man in the Toyota saw the man with the Lamborghini the next day crying like a child on his car and he and the Man in the Toyota what the hell is going on and the Man in the Lamborghini says I was through streets of Heaven and so my wife riding in roller skates
Guys, you shouldn't joke about 9/11. My great-uncle died that day. Best damn pilot in Iraq.
What did stephen hawking see before he died?
The blue screen of death
Once I almost died ill give it another shot out of the gun to finish my job
What happens if you inhale too much nitrous oxide (laughing gas?)
-You die of laughter.
Genie: You cannot wish for more wishes, immortality, or love Man: I wish not to die a virgin Genie: I just said no wishing for immortality
If a emo kid and the quiet kid had a fight the quiet kid would win cause the emo kid would cut himself to death
why do you think after death the angle says do not be afraid search up biblically accurate angles
Corpses aren’t funny- they’re dead serious
