Death jokes
Hey, do you know why America sucks? We have the death penalty.
Why did the skeleton not cross the road?
Because it did not have the guts.
Murder, murder, suicide by police.
Once upon a time, there was a man named Daniel. He was blind and deaf, and he worked at a morgue.
So, one time poor Dan got confused and started having sex with the rotting corpse.
He then came home and thought he was at the morgue, so he started disintegrating his sleeping wife.
Why did the orphan die on the road? Because they had no one to hold their hand.
Why do deer stay in front of a moving car?
To commit suicide.
Yo mama so fat, she died!
Wanna know why Stephen Hawking died?
He lost his Wi-Fi connection.
शाला टाइटैनिक को भी यमलोक जाना पड़ा। हम तो आदमी है।
Shala, even Titanic had to go to Yamlok. We are just men.
Congratulations to Avicii for passing his 3-day milestone of sobriety!
Stephen Hawking died because he got hacked by me, and the update was too strong.
What did the kid with cancer say? "Can-I see my mom one more time?"
What were Brian Cant's last words before he died?
"I used to do it, but now I cant!"
Q: How did we learn cats don't land on their feet?
A: We asked Mufasa from the Lion King.
I can't sleep, that's because you're dead.
To be brutally honest, I think his wife let him die for money, because they could just plug him back in. Surely they have an Android cable about?
How did Jesus kill himself?
He fell from his bike.
How many times did he die?
Once on a bike and once when he fell from a cloud in Heaven.
What's the grossest thing ever?
A bag of dead babies.
What's even more gross?
The bottom one is still wriggling!
Did you hear he died of a virus? A computer virus.
Why did Bob Ross die?
Because the paint brush stabbed him.