Death jokes
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
His Windows update wasn't available.
What is scarier than a pile of dead babies?
The bottom one ate its way out!
What do you sing on a dead person's birthday?
"Happy Death-Day To You!"
How did Steven Hawking die? His WiFi disconnected.
What’s the difference between a 5.7l v8 and a dead baby?
If you lift the hood on my car, you won’t find a 5.7l v8.
He's dead.
What happens when Stephen Hawking dies? Windows plays the shutdown music.
What did the beachgoers in North Carolina say when there was a tsunami?
Nothing, they died.
Are you a rope? Cause I'm tryna put you around my neck 😏
Never kill an orphan, because then that will end their misery.
You know what would be the best last thing to say before you die? "No, you certainly can't." JFK's assassin certainly can!
My wife said, "Why oh why have you ordered carpet, our house is lovely?"
Thankfully the carpet was put to good use in the end, no more stupid comments coming from a rolled up Emily in the bottom of the ocean!
Don't you find it ironic that Kobe Bryant bounced his helicopter off the ground like a basketball?
What has two legs, two arms, one dead and covered in red?
My ex-wife.
When your cousin who has a lisp died from the impostor in Among Us,
"THE IMPASTA KILLED MEH!"
Why did the dick suck my ass? They died.
Please encourage me to do suicide! ;P
I knew a girl that died from having phone sex... He died of hearing aids.
When you look exactly like your dead cousin and everybody thinks she faked her death.
FUCKING MENT
Why did Mr. Peanut die?
His cane snapped!