Death

Death jokes

Brother

So Timmy was walking down the street with his friend Lea. Suddenly a car drives by and Timmy waves at the car.

Lea looks at him, puzzled, then later asks him; "Why'd you wave at that car back there?"

Timmy replies "Oh that was my brother, he went to the bar. He must just be driving home..."

Gun

Three guys are escaping from North Korea through a tunnel.

The guards know that they are coming and will shoot them with paintball guns as a warning.

The guys show up and the guards shoot them.

The guys die because the guards used real guns.

Accident

My dad had a very unfortunate accident with his death. I clearly asked for Jammy Dodgers and got Bourbons!

Midget

Did you hear about the midget who was beaten to death playing volleyball at a nudist colony?

Life

My life is so meaningless that I committed a crime just to get shot. 0-0

This is not a joke; this is just about death...

Ladder

I still remember my dad's last words, "You c***! You let the ladder go, you cuuunt!"

Smack! He hit the ground and bled out.

People

What does "off-limits" have in common with dead people? They can’t see their family.

People

What do dead people and orphans have in common? They can't see their family.

Orphan

Let's stop this, it's not funny. Oh wait, the orphans are all gone with nobody. 😂

Orphan

How do you break an orphan's wall in their room in the orphanage?

Tell them to put a tally on the wall with a pen for every second their parents are missing.