Death jokes
What is the difference between Princess Diana and my laptop?
When my laptop crashes, I give a s**t.
My parents are like the Twin Towers, only one came back.
Why did Techno die?
They broke his bed.
Why did the child die? To see God, our father.
I got caught fucking a dead body by my family. RIP grandma.
Why don't a gun and an orphan have anything in common? The gun is actually useful.
The orphans all died!!!
Oh wait, no one cares...
Their parents are all dead anyway. We are just making them happier. They get to join their parents in hell.
How did Technoblade actually die?
He got stabbed!
Why can’t Helen Keller drive?
It’s because she’s dead.
The 2nd worst thing that happened to an orphan was finding out the milk man passed.
What's the difference between Paul Walker and a computer?
I give a fuck when my computer crashes.
What's a man's favorite thing that starts with "m" and ends with "arriage?"
Miscarriage.
What starts with "M" and ends in "arrige" and is a man's favorite thing?
Miscarriage, this joke never gets old, just like the baby.
Why can’t orphans have sex, my friends? Why? They have none to call daddy.
When the school shooter makes the emo kid hang himself and the autistic kid thinks it's a piñata: 🤪🏏
Where did the mushroom kill himself?
In the mushroom.
What’s the difference between me and Chester Bennington?
I know how to use an exercise band.
Stephen Hawking did not die; he deleted himself.
Why did the suicidal person cross the road? He was waiting for a car.
I turned the light on, and my dad said turn it off, so I unplugged his life support.