When I died, my friend said he'd cover me.
I accidentally said, "Go cry to your mom," to an orphan. 😭
An orphan asked his caretaker where his parents are, and the caretaker said, "A place called home."
Guess whose parents didn't survive?
Liv's parents.
The death of JFK must have splattered on the news.
Why did Kenny die?
Was he trying to kill himself? Was he just dicking around?
What's 2ft long, blue, and stiff and keeps a woman up all night?
Cot death.
Why did Stephen Hawking die so soon?
Because his misses bought the wrong batteries.
October 1, 2017 is when the Mandalay Bay became the Mandalay spray. Thank Steve for that.
Where did the children go after he stepped on the land mine?
There, there, over there, and over here too.
My bro’s parents died, but he didn’t know why.
Turns out they died because he was a failure, and he would be going to an orphanage in 4 days.
What's the difference between Rorochan and skydivers?
One does it for the cash, the other for the views.
Once, there was a woman who had a husband and a dog. The husband dies.
The dog would always sleep under the bed, and when the woman would go to sleep, she'd put her hand down, and the dog would lick it to say she/he was alright. One night, it was thunderstorming. She put her hand down and the dog licked normally. She heard the dog whimper, so she put her hand down like normal, as the dog always does, he/she licks her hand.
Then she heard dripping coming from the bathroom, so she went to go stop the leaking that might be coming from the tap, but the tap wasn't on, nor was it dripping. She turns on the light and looks up at the roof to see if the roof was leaking but turns out her dog was hung by its head above the bathtub.
On the mirror it said, "Humans can lick too," in the dog's blood.
This is a true story, don't be afraid to look it up!
What do Stephen Hawking and the Wicked Witch have in common?
If you throw water over them, they both die...
A man comes to a bar and has a drink. Then his bully came to him and stole his drink. Then the bully asked, "What's wrong?"
The man said that "I'm trying to kill myself. I tried getting hit by a train, but the train went on a different track. Then I tried to jump off a bridge, but I fell on a boat full of pillows. Then I tried to poison myself."
Then the bully says, "Then what?" Then the man replied, "You just drank it." Then the man left.
One night, a father heard his daughter saying good night.
"Good night, Mom."
"Good night, Dad."
"Good night, Mamah."
"Good bye, Papa."
The next day her papa died.
He heard her saying them a month later.
"Good night, Mom."
"Good night, Dad."
"Good bye, Mamah."
The next day her mamah died.
Well, her dad was scared for his life. He knew he was next. Well, his daughter said them again.
"Good night, Mom."
"Good bye, Dad."
The next day, the mail man dropped dead on their porch.
DDLC be like: "You kinda left her (Sayori) hanging."
And Yuri TOOK A SEAT...
On the floor.
And died.
The end.
Why is your nan gay? Because she's an orphan.
Why did Mimi cross the road?
She had cancer.
How many dead babies does it take to paint my room?
It depends how many bullets you have.
