Death jokes
What do you do when you see a naked dead girl?
Check your map, you're obviously going in circles.
Repeat after me: Die angle; die angle; sweetie. Angels don't die! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
What’s George Floyd’s favorite color? Neon black.
I make suicidal jokes because I am a suicidal joke. And now for my closing act at the end of the rope.
How do you get a koala to die? Kill it.
Why did Stephen Hawking die so soon?
Because his misses bought the wrong batteries.
Most orphans were born on the highway. It’s where most accidents [happen].
Old people kept saying "you're next" to me at weddings, so I started saying it to them at funerals.
An emo girl and a squirrel both fall out of a tree. Who hits the ground first? The squirrel. The rope stops the emo girl.
What do I and a brand new chandelier have in common?
One of these days, we’re both gonna be hanging from the ceiling.
A depressed man buys a gun for suicide, but then thinks, "maybe I shouldn't be doing this," and asks a friend for help. He returns with a rope.
What did they find in Paul Walker's glovebox?
His head and shoulders.
Parents...
Guy 1: How far are we going?
Guy 2: About as far as somebody's miscarriage.
I will never forget my grandpa's last words:
"What the fuck is in this drink?"
Are you a gravestone?
Because I really wish you were on top of me right now!
I’d make a Kobe joke, it just wouldn’t land right.
If at first you don't succeed, oh well, so much for skydiving.
Why did Kenny die?
Was he trying to kill himself? Was he just dicking around?
What is the difference between Juice Wrld and an orphan?
One is loved by all.