Dating jokes
Who thinks Gwen and dumb bitch prince should *STOP* dating! AND LET THE REAL LOVERS *Gwen and Aiden* RESUME TO *LOVE* SAY ME IN THE COMMENTS SO NOT!!!!!!!!
Hello.
Anyone does online dating and needs someone? HERE I am!
Me when people ask how old my girlfriends are:
"There's 2, there're 4, there're 6, there're 8."
Meeting a girl at the park is good. But parking meat in a girl is better.
First date be like:
Me: "I work with animals every day."
Her: "Oh, how sweet! What is it exactly that you do with them?"
Me: "I'm a butcher."
DO MEEEEEEE totaly didn't copy nobody ehehehe
Roblox Brookhaven be like:
"ABC if you wanna be adopted."
"ABC if you wanna be my friend."
"ABC if you wanna be a banker."
"ABC if you wanna rob the bank."
"ABC if you wanna date."
"ABC if you wanna sex."
The date is April 1st.
Somebody asks you what you are doing.
“I guess you could say I’m... fooling around ( ✧≖ ͜ʖ≖)“
Roses are red, violets are blue. I have five fingers, two of them are for you.
I just figured out the "X" in Max stands for the button on Tinder every girl wants to press when they see him.
One way to not pick up a girl is to say, “Are you an American school because I wanna shoot kids into you?” I tried it on a girl, and she is now terrified to come near me.
How was I supposed to know she was already pregnant?
What color is Sonic's ball?
Blue because he keeps getting rejected.
Excuse me, are you a chiropractor? Because I want to take a crack at taking you out to dinner.
Woman: I want a man who is 6 feet and 6 inches.
Man: Is 6 feet and 6 inches one thing or two?
Woman: Two, I want a man who is 6 feet and also is 6 inches.
Man: Shit!
So, I went up to an Australian girl. She looked like she was 20, and I said, "Can I have your phone number, sweetheart?" She said, "696969." I said, "Oh, haha, okay." A few days later, her mother called me and said she's 15.
Why is it better to date an orphan?
Their parents are never home.
Guy: Hi, how was your day today?
Woman: Good!
Guy: *Well I can’t ask her out cause she’s pregnant*
Guy: How many months pregnant are you?
Woman: What to you mean?!?! Also, I’m not pregnant.
One day a woman met with a man behind an abandoned shop.
The man asked for some crack.
The woman turned around and said, "Here."
That's where the crack was, you guessed it.
The next day, she wiped it clean, ready for the next guest who "wanted crack."
I told my therapist you are too fat and ugly to date grown men. Then she asked me, "You wanna give a judgemental reaction about that?" I said, "Okay, you smell rat pee on somebody's cock."
I asked my brother who is autistic how he found his gf. He said on a special website.
Ever notice 9-1-1 (the number for the po-po) is the Great Date (9-11)... Hmmm.