What's do u call a family picture for an orphan
A selfie
What colour would the confetti be at a baby shower in 2025
Orange bc their having a they/them baby
What is an iraqui’s kid favorite game
Minesweeper
I had to write an essay about africa and I failed cause I plagiarized the hunger games script
I was digging in our garden and found a chest full of gold coins. I wanted to run straight home to tell my wife about it. Then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.
A man wakes from a coma. His wife changes out of her black clothes and, irritated, remarks, “I really cannot depend on you in anything, can I!”
Q: What's the difference between LeBron James and a priest?
A: The size of balls they play with
Q: How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?
A: You give them a sandy hook
Q: Why is Hitler better than Biden?
A: Because Hitler gave gas to his people for free
Don’t challenge Death to a pillow fight. Unless you’re prepared for the reaper cushions.
I wrote an essay today about africa and I FAILED even though i wrote a perfect rendition of the hunger games storyline
A guy is on trial for leading a mob to gang rape a woman he'd taken out for a date. His defense is that he was helping her live out a fantasy. The DA is furious and asks him WTF gave him that idea. He said, "After the date I took her back to her house, pulled out my dick, and tried to hand it to her. She told me, 'You've gotta be fucking kidding me. Seriously, go get some help!"
The twin towers ordered a pepperoni pizza. They got plane. ( courtesy of my bff)
Why can’t you play uno with Mexicans?
Because they steal all the green cards!
Do yall know the saying "Hang in there"? Well FUCK that because i might as well be hanging myself
Bligitty blot, bliggity blit
you better not be talkin' shit 🔫
Once my girlfriend asked me to give her lipstick and I accidentally gave her the glue stick. She won't talk to me any more.
Dr Suess Dark jokes HEY THERE LITTLE MISTER IM DATING YOUR SISTER!!!
My friend: I want to cut myself. Me: No don’t do that. *hands lighter* do this instead.
What is more fun than throwing a baby off a cliff?
Catching it with a pitchfork
