If McDonald's is fast food, then Dairy Queen is fast cream.
I just encountered a father and son moment over some milk.
The dad finally came back with the milk!
What do you get when you mix a grizzly bear and milk? Mauled.
I tried to make a pun about cheese, but I couldn't think of any good "whey" to do it.
Why was the cheese always so confident? Because it had such a "gouda" self-image.
What do you call a non-binary person that is lactose intolerant?
Non-buy dairy.
Why did the mailman come to the house?
To come back with the milk.
Why do orphans not know if they're lactose intolerant?
Because their dad never came back with milk.
I have no father or no milk. Like if you relate.
A cow is an earthquake, it's a milkshake.
Okay, so I have a dairy and sugar allergy, and if I eat it, I get REALLY CONSTIPATED, so this is me when I’m constipated ᕙ(⇀‸↼‵‵)ᕗ lol.
What’s long, white, and full of cream? A cheese stick.
How did your dad come back with the milk? The Milky Way.
My dad is now a milkman.
Now I have over 50 brothers and sisters.
I went home to my girlfriend with milk! She said, "Oh thank you honey!"
Then I got a call from a girl named Melissa. She called and said, "Steven, where the hell have you been? It's been two weeks and you still haven't come back yet?"
I have an addiction to cheddar cheese, but it's only mild.
I went to a store to get milk, but when I got home, there were a million cows waiting for milk, so they killed me.
I was going to tell my dad a joke, but he still hasn't come back with the milk yet.
What is the toughest thing about living a vegan life?
Getting up at 5am to milk the almonds.
Dad joke time:
What do you call a cow in an earthquake?
A milkshake.
