Dad Jokes

What is a "dad"?

Little Johnny was playing outside and steps on a honeybee, his dad sees this and says "i saw what you did and for that, you get no honey for two weeks." Johnny replies "i don't care, i don't like honey anyway." About fifteen minutes later little Johnny is playing with the butterflies and rips the wings off of one. His dad bursts out and says " i saw that, and for it you get no butter for a month." Little johnny replies "I don't care, i don't like butter anyway." Both little johnny and his dad go in for dinner, johnny's mother sees a cockroach on the ground and steps on it. little johnny looks and smiles and says "do you want to tell her or should i?"

Why shouldn't you trust tree's? because they seem shady

yo dad is so hairy people chased him because they thought he was bigfoot.

stolen dad jokes: "I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered."

Why does a orphanage have any milk because dad never came back with the milk

My Dad: Son, history always repeats itself.

Me: So you're gonna leave me again?

Ur dad oh wait you don’t have that

I saw an orphan on the street i said where’s your parents he cried and said my mum and dad died in a car crash 😆😆😂😂🤣

Why do Orphans not like jokes?

Because they hate your mom and your dad joke because they miss their parents 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Why are orphans bad at dad jokes

Because they don't have a dad to tell them

I went to ask my friends mom if I could have a sleepover Then I rememberd they did not have a mom or dad

A dad is in a weelchair and his dughter goes dont step on a crack

I tried kidnapping a kid today and told him I was his dads friend and I would take him home, he just curled up into a ball and started crying, kidnapping must be easy.