Dad

Dad jokes

Name

    • Son: Dad, why did you name my sister Paris?

    Dad: Because she was made there.

    Son: Thanks, Dad.

    Dad: You're welcome, Backseat.

  • 5

    • Racist

    • I am a racist, and I put my milk before cereal. Well, to be honest, that was when I had milk, but one day my dad says he was going to get some... then he left.

    Now when I see a black guy, I yell, "Thanks for picking the cotton to make my shirt!"

  • 2

    • Hospital

    • What's the quickest way to get to the hospital? Just stand in the middle of a busy road.

    What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

    What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.

    What do you do after raping a deaf person? Cut their fingers off so they don't tell anyone.

    MORE JOKES COMING SOON LMAO ;]

  • 4
    • Dad memes

    Mom

    • My mom told me to make my dad smile, and she will give me $100, so I said, "The Cowboys are gonna win the Super Bowl." He smiled, but my mom didn't give it to me.

    Anyways, I forgot about my package coming, and the mailman came, and I said, "I like your hat; teal looks nice on you," and he smiled, and my mom gave me $100.

  • 1

    • Trick

    • 1. You can't wash your eyes with soap.

    2. You can't count your hair.

    3. You can't breathe through your nose with your tongue out.

    4. You just tried number three.

    5. When you tried number 3, you realized it was possible, only you look like a dog.

    6. You're smiling right now because you realized you were fooled.

    7. You skipped number 5.

    8. You just checked if there was a number 5.

    9. This is not my joke; all credit goes to Steps.

  • 4

    • Lie

    • Dad: If you study, then I will buy you a new iPhone.

    Son: Okay, I'll do it!

    5 hours later...

    Son: I'm done!

    Dad: I lied.

    Son: So did I!

  • 1