How do you turn a Chinese person into an American? Put a bag of ice on their eyes.
Did you see that Chinese man with no legs?
No, I'm blind.
Stop ruining my jokes.
Isn't that the Chinese man with no legs' fault?
It's not like He Go Ann Hi Weh.
My Chinese friend died recently, So Yung.
Why can't the Chinese play soccer?
Because peasants get a piece of grass, and they start farming.
An African man visits his friend in the US.
“I just flew in yesterday,” the African man says. “And boy are my arms tired!”
“You know, that’s kind of an old joke here in America,” replied his friend.
“Joke?” the African man said. “I’ve been holding my hands in the air yelling ‘don’t shoot’ ever since I got to this damn country!”
Did you hear about the Scottish man who murdered his wife?
He totally kilt her.
Confucius say, man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
Why couldn't a lifeguard save the hippie? -- Because he was too far out, man.
The black nurse tells me she has been a vegan for 29 years. The father sitting next to me asks, "So you don't miss fried chicken?"
Gays: I like men.
Straights: I like women.
Russia: Hole is hole.
Why don't Japanese people like iPhones?
Because they are afraid of American airdrops.
What does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common? They both ask people, "Where's the meat?"
Africa.
It is interesting how different nations have their dogs make different sounds.
An American dog goes Woof, a Czech dog goes Haf, a Dutch dog goes Blaf, and a Chinese dog goes Sizzle.
TommyInnit is a joke.
Who can jump the highest?
Emos, some of them are still in the air.
What did the Roman say to the gladiator?
See you later, gladiator.
What did the emo say before he crossed the road?
"Fuck my life."
Michael proved anything is possible in America. Where else can a poor black boy grow up to be a rich white woman?
Do you know how to make 4 Albanians stand on a shoebox?
Just tell them that it floats.
