So I was sitting on the couch with a woman, and I asked her, "Does this napkin smell like chloroform?"
Crime Jokes
Why did the picture go to jail?
Cause it was framed!
A boy is about to be sentenced for killing his parents. He begs the judge to spare his life. The judge asks for one good reason he should be shown any mercy. The boy replies, "I’m an orphan, your honor."
As a 13 year old, online dating is a tough thing.
Every time I meet someone new, they end up in jail.
Why do pedophiles never win a race?
Because they are always coming in a little behind.
What do Catholic priests and school shooters have in common?
They both like to dump their loads into little kids.
Yo mama so dumb, she got hit by a cup and told the police she got mugged.
Stop hating on pedos. At least they drive slow in school zones.
I heard that Jimmy Savile never wanted to be famous... All he ever wanted was to settle down, and have kids.
What do pedophiles and Xboxes have in common?
They both get turned on by kids.
If you get pinched by a man in a wheelchair, can you call it a "hit and can't run?"
What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?
Gang rape.
What’s a pedophile’s favorite shoe? White vans.
What is a pedophile's favorite dating site?
Kinder
Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.
Why did the skeleton not rob the bank?
He did not have the guts!
What did the pedophile say when he got out of prison?
I feel like a kid again.
What can you say to make a rape victim feel better?
"It will be over soon."
What's the hardest part about being a paedophile?
Trying to fit in.
Urban areas are filled with terrorists, feminists, liberals, and murderers. Which one is not like the others? Murderers because they don't pretend to have a cause.
