What can you say to make a rape victim feel better?
"It will be over soon."
Yo mama so fat, she got arrested for carrying ten pounds of crack.
What type of tape do kidnappers use?
Abduct-Tape.
So I was being robbed, and this guy had the gun to my head, so I told him he was holding it backwards.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd get in the van if I were you...
What's the difference between drugs and kids?
I don't sell drugs.
Is necrophilia considered cracking open a cold one?
Incest. A game the whole family can play.
Two men broke into a drugstore and stole all the Viagra. The police put out an alert to be on the lookout for the two hardened criminals.
Urban areas are filled with terrorists, feminists, liberals, and murderers. Which one is not like the others? Murderers because they don't pretend to have a cause.
Why are Americans so shocked when it comes to Mexican drug cartels?
Because none of the drug lords (or their associates, for that matter) have shot up a school.
What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy children.
9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.
An orphanage got robbed yesterday. Let's just say that's the second worst thing to happen to those orphans. At least they didn't end up like their parents.
Two pedophiles talking to each other:
"Do you got two fives for one ten?"
What does the SpongeBob intro and a pedo have in common?
Are you ready, kids?🤣
What do you call a gay drive by?
A fruit roll up.
Kelly Clarkson and Ian Watkins of the Lostprophets both walk into a bar. The bartender asked, "Hitting on some 2-year-olds today?" It may have been an innocuous question, if it weren't for the fact that the bartender is Chris Hansen.
Technically, suicide is murder, and murder is illegal, so if I kill myself, my body should go to jail.
Say what you want against pedophiles, but they slow down in school zones.
