Crime jokes
People say rape is bad. It is because I don't want STD and HIV.
What's the difference between a drug dealer and a prostitute?
A prostitute can wash its crack and sell it again.
Where did Jeffrey Epstein go to college?
Bring them young.
What happens when you find a bomb at your local bazaar?
It becomes a flee market.
What is the difference between a terrorist and a prostitute?
The prostitute can blow you more than once.
My life #freemymanrkelly
What do the Mafia and pussies have in common?
One slip of the tongue, and you’re in deep shit.
Why do pirates pirate? Because they "Arrrrrrrrrgggghhh!" Hahahahahahahahaha!
If being sexy was a crime, you can call me......... a law-abiding citizen.
The amount of women judging me for raping a poor lady is terrible. You weren't there. You don't know!
How did the rape victim on a diet lose 21 grams?
She died.
A guy goes into the gas station and says, "I need a box of rubbers with pesticide."
The cashier said, "Pesticide? Don't you mean spermicide?"
The guy says, "No! My old lady has had a bug up her ass all week, and I am going to kill it."
A sandwich is a sandwich, but a Manwich is a meal.
-- Jeffery Dahmer
A police officer pulls a man over. "Hands in the air!"
The man said, "Okay."
Why are there adoption centers? Because it's a market for pedophiles.
A gay rapist saves a female rape victim, then rapes the rapist.
When the school shooter shoots the autistic kid and he thinks he's having an orgasm.
Why did the cake say to the scammer? "I'll scam you up!"
Will: Let's bring Hannibal a gift today!
Beverly: Yeah, I bet he’d love that!
Will: Yey!
Beverly: What should we bring him?
Will: *holds up a bucket and knife with an insane looking smile* Come in the bucket!
Someone burgled my house the other day. It was terrible.
They ripped all of the front and back pages of my dictionaries. Things went from bad to worse.