Crime jokes
What's the difference between an escaped prisoner and an orphan?
Only one is wanted.
What’s the difference between jail and my basement?
Some people are let out of jail.
Did you hear about the kidnapping? Yeah, he woke up.
Why do orphans wanna be a criminal?
So that they can be wanted.
when Ted Bundy found out he was getting the death penalty, he was pretty shocked...
Santa and Bill Cosby's favorite quote: "Don't be dumb, make sure they're numb, and always use a condom!"
Why do orphan girls love pedophiles? Because they get to call someone “Daddy”!
How do you make rape funny? Tickle her while you do it.
What do you call someone that illegally transports cups? - A s-mug-gler.
Q: How can you tell that a pedophile likes music?
A: He rapes D minor.
It's only rape.
If she finds out.
Teachers at a school shooting be like: damn it. That's the third one this week and it's only Monday.
How do you verify a rape claim? You make it true, and then the person is a victim for sure.
Shit! My neighborhood barber just got arrested for selling drugs! I've been his customer for 4 years, but I had no idea he was a barber.
No means no, but if you use chloroform, it’s a guaranteed yes.
Did you know that statistically, 1 in 10 people live next to a pedophile? Not me though, I live next to a 10 year old boy with a fat ass.
It isn't really rape if you speak different languages. I mean, how is the man supposed to know what she is saying? Those could be tears of joy and screams of pleasure.
What 3 words started Jeffery Dahmer's cannibalism?
This isn't ketchup.
I'm so mad I got arrested for rape, even though the girl never said no. The prosecution said she was mute, but how was I supposed to know? She never told me.
According to statistics, 5 of 6 people enjoy gang rape.