Crime

Crime jokes

London

Apparently, someone in London gets stabbed every 52 seconds.

Poor bastard.

Bill Cosby

Santa and Bill Cosby's favorite quote: "Don't be dumb, make sure they're numb, and always use a condom!"

Rape

It isn't really rape if you speak different languages. I mean, how is the man supposed to know what she is saying? Those could be tears of joy and screams of pleasure.

Memes

Cup

What do you call someone that illegally transports cups? - A s-mug-gler.

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  • Kidnapping

    A man is sitting on a bench at a playground where children are playing. A man named Chris comes up and asks, “Which one is yours?” The man said, “I don’t know, I’m still deciding.”

    Man

    There's a man in Florida with no arms or legs who is armed and on the run.

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  • Pedophile

    Have you heard about the pedophile who was found guilty of robbery?

    - He robbed children of their innocence.

    Pedophile

    Did you know that statistically, 1 in 10 people live next to a pedophile? Not me though, I live next to a 10 year old boy with a fat ass.

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  • Sex

    Have you heard about the guy whose friends teased him because he pays for sex? He doesn't pay anymore.

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  • Rape

    I'm so mad I got arrested for rape, even though the girl never said no. The prosecution said she was mute, but how was I supposed to know? She never told me.

    Cellar

    What does a kid and wine have in common?

    Shit, I forgot, but they're both locked in my cellar right now.

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  • Rape

    Did you hear about the boy who got raped by a group of women in the park whilst jogging? Now there are lots of male joggers in the area.