Crime jokes
What did the hooker say when she found out the cash she was paid with for services rendered was counterfeit?
I've been raped!
"Yes, officer! It was a requirement to run over that child. It matched perfectly with the beat drop!"
Why did the teacher get arrested?
He gave the orphan homework!
"Hippity hoppity, the school shooter spotted me."
What’s the difference between a child and someone who has been kidnapped?
One of them is a domesticated pet.
Welp
What is a pedophile's favorite piano note?
A Minor.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 broke into a daycare and ate 12 children before burning the building down.
What is the best feeling for an orphan when he plays Grand Theft Auto?
When he is wanted!
Why do prepubescent orphan girls love pedophiles? Because they get to call someone “Daddy”.
Found this girl in Hawaii.
Put a stick up her ass and she said, "Ayi."
An eight-year-old girl struggles to breathe as she lies on a hospital bed and waits for the doctor to come. After the doctor comes, he pulls his cock out of her mouth, and she can breathe much better.
What did the duck say to the drug dealer?
Gimme some of that quack!
Who are the best at bowling?
Terrorists, they always throw strikes.
A teenager went into a creepy house with his 3 friends. Only 2 came out. Where are the others?
(Getting brutally murdered.)
What happens when a battery commits a crime? They get charged!
Most people call it grave robbing...
I prefer to call it cryptocurrency.
Jeffrey Dahmer and his mother are having dinner.
His mother says, “I don’t like your friends.”
Then Jeff says, “You can eat the potatoes.”
Why are half the orphans missing? Because I took them, of course! :]
I watch my parents sleep with a knife in my hands. Only got caught once.
The real dead hooker joke is on all of us from the Fraser Valley in BC. You know damn well each and everyone of us ate that Pickton hooker pork. Considering it stretching from the 80's-2000's, pretty sure he got 4 generations of Valley folk with that Pickton pork.